My Novella’s Amazon Description (Happy Birthday, Me). Any Feedback?

   Posted by: Moses Siregar III   in My Work

Today’s my birthday, and just yesterday I got perhaps a not-so-wild idea. As I was re-reading my work, I stumbled upon a dramatic section of the story that I hope will make a great novella. So I’ve decided to get it up and available on Amazon in the Kindle store soon. My goal is to have it up on August 11th (next Wednesday), after getting enough copyediting eyeballs on it (including a professional or two). It will be available for $0.99.

I’ve started working on a description for the novella on Amazon. The description doesn’t focus on both sides of the conflict in my story, since the novella only follows certain characters. Here’s what I’ve got so far, and feel free to offer any feedback or suggestions.


HThe Black God's Warer father-king wants war. Her messianic brother wants peace. The black god wants his due. She suffers all the consequences.

King Vieri’s war against the lands of Pawelon rages into its tenth year, and with the kingdom’s holy savior, his son, en route to the fighting in the storied canyon, victory ought to come soon. Blocked after every effort and feeling abandoned by his god, King Vieri forces young Caio to lead his army to victory.

The Black One, Lord Danato, tortures Lucia with nightly visions, promising another ten years of bloodshed. Lucia aligns with her brother to bring about the surrender of Pawelon’s Rajah and his mystical sages, for the only alternative is to journey to Danato’s macabre underworld to beg for his mercy: A poisoned remedy guaranteeing heartbreak as compensation for the god’s assistance. Lucia knows the black god too well, ever since he entered her bed and dreams when she was ten.

Now Caio must command his father’s army and appeal to his own patron gods for their divine powers. Will the goddess of healing fulfill his martial prayers? And can someone who wants only to heal the world bring himself to kill another man?

A novella-length story introducing a new epic fantasy novel by the same title, currently scheduled for release in May of 2011.

My name is Moses Siregar III, and you can email me with comments at mosesmerlin@hotmail.com. My blog is called, “Moses and Dionysus Walk Into a Bar …” and you’ll find it at www.ScienceFictionFantasyBooks.net. I hope you’ll download the free sample of this work and go on to really enjoy it.

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 4th, 2010 at 12:04 pm and is filed under My Work. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

4 comments so far


Beautiful cover, Moses. I’m looking forward to the release, so you’ve already made one sale here 🙂
Izanobu recently posted..Sale Sale Sale Sale

August 5th, 2010 at 11:56 pm
Moses Siregar III

Aw, thanks so much. I’m definitely excited for it.

August 6th, 2010 at 12:04 am


This sounds epic enough to make two men’s hearts explode. Simultaneously/

Ben Godby recently posted..Dealing with time travel

August 6th, 2010 at 9:45 am
Moses Siregar III

Haha! Thanks Ben. I like my stories epic, that’s for sure.

August 6th, 2010 at 10:17 pm

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